by Elizabeth T. Andrews
American Reporter Correspondent
January 14, 2008
SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY BE WORSE
CARTERSVILLE, Ga. -- She is Woman. Hear her roar. Picked herself up off the floor and stood by her man even though she had sworn previously that she was not a "little Tammy Wynette." Brushed herself off and faced the entire world, humiliated and betrayed.
I remember hoping at the time of the Bill Clinton-Monica Lewinsky sorry sex saga ... hoping that Hillary would throw Bill and his underwear out the White House window and scream "I'm doing this for every woman who has endured what I have endured of your primitive belief that 'men gotta roam while the little woman sits home'."
She didn't. But perhaps she did make Bill a deal and we may be looking at its outcome. Perhaps she said "I'm going to run for President of The United States in 2008 and you are going to fall in line, resist your raging testosterone, and agree, right now, to help me become president or I'll do everything in my power to help the American citizens impeach you."
Hillary disappointed me for the first time when she dropped her maiden name, Rodham, during Bill's first run for the White House. That identity-erasing asinine archaic male-benefiting custom ranks right up there with the pronoun "he" that has, since language was invented, dismissed half the human race ... females.
But in spite of all my personal disgust with the federal government, politicians and linguists who can't invent an inclusive pronoun, I will be applauding Hillary as she moves toward the Democratic nomination for president ... and beyond, if she makes it.
No, I am not a Democrat ... or a Republican. I'm a disgusted American citizen who once proudly claimed to be a Libertarian until the two-party political machine wiped us off the map of politics into the trash bin of history. (Big political crooks don't like any platform that puts great emphasis on the term "self-government.")
I'll be throwing my headscarf into Madame Possible-President Hillary's ring because she has grit, political savvy, second-hand experience in what it means to be president, and because it may otherwise take another 200 more years to get a woman this close to the American presidency.
What we have in Hillary is not part of any male candidate's character. The female climb to the top of any mountain is a thousand times harder for a woman than a man. It takes a thousand times as much fortitude, courage and smiling determination even if the smile is often forced and the tears sometimes steal out around the eyeliner and the mascara.
What we also have in Hillary is the real possibility that this time maybe, just maybe, an American woman can sit in that coveted chair, remove the stench of old shaving lotion and cigars and replace it with the sweet smell of peace roses.
Perhaps then "All wo-men are created equal" will take on its true meaning and the greatest nation in the world will finally become an example of real democracy free of old unwritten-but-practiced gender laws, and "God is a man" mentality.
In addition, what we have in Hillary is a woman who doesn't have a problem with the English language, nor does her body language suggest a malfunctioning 747 about to fall out of the sky.
And on that subject, indulge me one more time.
Does stuttering, stammering, blushing, flushing, body jerks, pursed lips, highly uncomfortable looks replaced off and on by looks of little boy cockiness or adult haughtiness ... and a childish, squirmy inability to stand still ... do such tattletale body language signals inspire confidence in an audience listening to a speaker guilty of all of the above?
Does that speaker who says "ta" for to, "dudn't" for doesn't, "wudn't" for wasn't, and mangle "we have no quarrel with" or "have no qualms about" into "we have no qualms with ..."?
Does such a speaker deserve any more from us than a long sigh that says "What we have here, folks, is a buffoon who is emotionally insecure, psychologically impaired and one who has not bothered to learn how to speak properly."
Such internationally embarrassing moments were present again in a recent press conference with President Georhe W. Bush and Israeli leader Ehud Olmert, and they are present every time the little man from Texas opens his mouth. Which brings me to my point in this rather rambling diatribe.
We, the people, have elected a President with an IQ comparable to a squash. We have had to watch this incompetent little man besmirch a nation's once highly respected name. We have had to endure mental and real images of heads of state from all over the world meeting with this child-like "most powerful man in the world" and see, mirrored on their faces, slight disbelief and/or amusement. And we have almost another year to stand back and watch what other botched blunderings he heaps upon us before he becomes a page in the kindergarten section of American history.
Could Hillary Clinton on her worst day wreak greater havoc on us and the watching world?
I don't think so.
Am I concerned with the possibility of Bill Clinton being back in the White House telling Hillary how to handle the little man from Russia, the degenerate dictator from North Korea (degenerate because his henchmen go to school yards and round up little girls for his soldiers), or the bearded shrimp of Iran? (Does anyone other than me notice that all these fellas are short, angry men? Napoleon complex, maybe?)
But back to Hillary: Having endured humiliation on the world stage, it is highly unlikely that this gal with grit would be intimidated by any man who thinks she can be "managed" or that she ought to be home boiling a hambone for Bill's pinto beans.
And hidden deep in the recesses of my "Equality, or die!" mind lies the unspoken hope that if she gets to unpack again in the White House she will turn to Bill and say "Never mind unpacking your things. I don't need you anymore. Run along now and play with Monica, or Jennifer, or some of the others whose sandboxes you've slithered into. And, by the way, sdon as I'm settled, I'm going to write a book. You are going to be the main character. And I don't mean the 'hero.'"
AR Correspondent Elizabeth T. Andrews is based in Cartersville, Ga. Her Website features her columns and poetry. Write her at firstname.lastname@example.org, or at P.O. Box 816, Cartersville, GA 30120.