by Elizabeth T. Andrews
American Reporter Correspondent
October 28, 2007
LET'S PLAY BY THE RULES
CARTERSVILLE, Ga. -- Come then, let us decide on some nice ways to kill each other.
Maybe "nice" is not the best word, but we already agree that if one has to kill somebody some ways are nicer than other ways.
Take, for example, the use of biological/chemical weapons. Why, everybody knows only barbarians and tyrants would use those horrible things. They rank right up there with beheading. How gross can you get!
Chemicals take your breath away and scald your skin and disfigure your whole body and ruin everything around you and no civilized nation would ever be caught dead using them. They're as bad as that awful thing dropped a few years ago on Japan by -- what was his name? Oh, yeah. Harry something. I've forgotten why he ordered it's use but I remember it wiped out ... wasn't it more than 200,000 people?
That definitely was not nice.
But back to the rules we're here today to agree on.
Let's call them "Rules of ... ." Hmmm. Let me see. We don't want to say "war." It's such a harsh word. Why don't we say "engaging"? After all, we'll be engaging in civilized ways to kill each other.
What's that you say? "Engagement" is a better word? Very well. Let's call our rules "Rules of Engagement." Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it.
More tea? Yes, it is good. John Grey, of course.
Here is what we purpose:
Rules of Engagement
Just for the record, our God instructs us to "Love one another, don't kill anybody, and do not do to others what you would not want done to you." It is your fault that you force us to violate what we have been taught, and that is why these rules are so important. We will not kill you in ways that we would not want to be killed, and if it has to be done we will try to do it nicely.
Here. Sign here. Let me pour that for you. One lump or two?
AR Correspondent Elizabeth T. Andrews is based in Cartersville, Ga. Her Website features her columns and poetry. Write her at email@example.com, or at P.O. Box 816, Cartersville, GA 30120.